Thursday, June 17, 2010

I hate getting knocked down.

Sometimes everything is going absolutely perfect, and then...things suck.
What can you do?

Today had me thinking way too hard. I spent time cutting tomatoes, cucumbers, and lettuce thinking about stuff I really shouldn't worry about. Consequence? Cut on my right ring finger that still burns because I was distracted while prepping food in the kitchen.

I could say unfair, but I'm not going to. Things like this happen for a reason, and I continue to give thanks in all circumstances, regardless of the circumstances.

It's just...difficult sometimes. But I'm in a place that inspires me more than ever, and I've been getting emotions out of myself in the healthiest way possible, which means I'm writing music and running like crazy. Reading the bible and praying constantly. Devotions. Meditation. Focusing on the one who will provide for me all that I need.

I just wish for once, things would work out the way I've always dreamed they would. But the reality is I can wish and wait all I want, but nothing is going to change God's will for me. I have plans for myself, and God has plans for me, and until they match up perfectly I'm going to be stuck in ruts like today where I'm so confused and frustrated about everything.

Getting them to match up means getting rid of my desires on focusing on where the Lord sends me. Doing what He calls me to. Living my entire life for him, instead of trying to make my life perfect on my own. He has an amazing and beautiful plan for me, and I need to embrace that instead of attempting to "fix" what I am already blessed with.

Tonight, I am falling into His arms again and letting him take control.

"If His grace, is an ocean, we're all sinking..."

Respectfully submitted,